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I'm getting worried, 'bout myself.

Posted on 2006.02.04 at 21:52
Mood of the moment: pensivepensive
Current monotonous song: Missing You - Jem
I need to find some more interests and hobbies. My life is so boring now. I go through it but don't revel in it. Since I seem to have a weird apathy where though there are many topics and hobbies I find interesting, etc. I never find enough motivation to pursue them or find out more about them. I'm losing my will to do anything. One of these days I'm just gonna lose the will to do anything whatsoever. And I'll become a vegetable, never leaving my bed.

My mind is wandering and not working much as of late. For some reason, when people speak of interesting topics, ones I know I should find thought provoking and are in line with my typical interests, I'll, rather than become engrossed in a train of thought, zone out and forget what was so interesting. I may be having memory problems, I swear, I have more trouble remembering names (of historical figures or even celebrities) quickly, and I tend to forget phrases/complete thoughts that I form soon after they come to me, no matter how much I try and remember them. Just last night I had an interesting thought and I formed it into an awesomely phrased quote, but in the few seconds it took me to find a pen, I forgot most of it, and it's profundity. I have to write everything down (on my hand) nowadays if I really need to remember it. And that doesn't even help sometimes.

I'm starting to get worried about myself and my sanity. This all may just be a side affect of all the stress and emotion I've been feeling lately, but if so, it's been getting worse in its effect on me over the past few months. Also for those same past few months I have/had been feeling tired and sick, etc.

But I won't let anything pull me down.
I swear I'll defeat it.
Just give me something to prove myself.
Or let me be near.
And I will blossom beyond imagining.
For I live for others.
And thrive because of them.

I need a simple project to do. Any ideas?

I forgot how much I enjoyed doing little things, such as fixing a shoe ^_______^, relaxing in comfortable clothes, observing people, or giving support and showing understanding towards others.


head in the clouds, feet on the ground
silverandgold06 at 2006-02-05 18:27 (UTC) ("Link, because it feels right.")
If you have been feeling like this for the past few months, I think you might want to see someone about it. Especially with the memory thing.

A simple project....do you like to sew? Make a dress. Or an outfit of some kind.
don't you know? I love/hate...
darkluceid at 2006-02-06 01:43 (UTC) ("Link, because it feels right.")
I went to the doctor a little over a week ago. But not much came of that.

My sewing machine scares me, though I would like to make a dress or outfit, it would be too complicated. I want a simple project. Or a non-sewing one maybe.
head in the clouds, feet on the ground
silverandgold06 at 2006-02-06 21:55 (UTC) ("Link, because it feels right.")
Ok more simple...can you knit? It is really easy to learn if you don't know how. Instructions on the internet are easy to find.
don't you know? I love/hate...
darkluceid at 2006-02-07 01:23 (UTC) ("Link, because it feels right.")
xD I've tried knitting before, but I'm not good at it. I prefer projects using foam board, model magic, paint, wood, cardboard, cloth, etc.
don't you know? I love/hate...
darkluceid at 2006-02-07 01:29 (UTC) ("Link, because it feels right.")
But thanks for the suggestions. ^^ *grins*
head in the clouds, feet on the ground
silverandgold06 at 2006-02-07 01:50 (UTC) ("Link, because it feels right.")
De rien. ;)
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